A Journey

This life is truly a journey, isn't it?

Full of unexpected twists and turns. Full of miracles and surprises. Love. Joy. Lessons. Challenges. Disappointments. Sorrow. But at any time during any of these things you can always find one thing. Hope.

As I look to the Savior and think of the cross I am blown away everytime. Everytime, my eyes are lifted from the challenges here to gaze at the wonderous sight of Grace. Hanging on a cross for me. Giving me freedom, and promise of Eternity with the Father. Hope.

I have seen the Lord bring about miraculous changes in my relationship with my brothers, and their relationship with eachother. We enjoy just hanging out together now. We laugh and joke. We drive to the gas station together to get polar pops. We can vent to one another about life and show sensitivity. We talk about next year when they will come to visit me at college and when I'll come home. We still argue, shoot unkind comments at eachother and lose our patience but our relationship has been restored by the Redeemer and I can't wait to see the precious friendship with these guys blossom even more. Hope.

This journey of life has brought me through 2 years of college searching. We thought I was graduating early but it didn't work out so this is the 2nd winter I've done college visits. I have seen the Lord grow in me a love for a college, and this week I found out the finances are just not going to work. And now it's time for Him to lead me elsewhere. My heart is aching this week as I plod forward and try to move past the dreams that I had for next year. He knows very well the plans He has for me. I know and rest and trust in that. I have prayed that I would fall more in love with Jesus, more in love than ever before. I want my Jesus to be my First Love. And I want that love to go above my desires, my comfort, my security in the future I had envisioned and find in Him my rest and assurance. So with that, "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead," Philippians 3:13b I look to Christ and trust that He knows what He's doing. I am trusting that He has a school for me, scholarships, a great campus ministry, and friends. Hope.

I have seen God MOVE MOUNTAINS in my "heart country." Guatemala is reopening adoptions!!! PRAISE JESUS THE KING! I am so excited about this. Immediately after reading about it my heart stopped.....what does this mean for my Claudia girl? (Even if her case isn't reassessed, this is still a miracle for the other thousands of orphans in Guatemala.) The answer is i don't know. We don't know if this could get her case reopened. We don't know if this could be the "window" for our family to jump through to make her ours. We just don't know. At first, I had a bitter attitude, I'll admit. Why won't God make this rollercoaster stop?! And the same week that I find out I have to make up a new college plan?! Today was the first day that it sunk in and I have wept several times today over the enormity of how amazing it is. This could be the answer to our prayers. Years of prayers that this sweet girl could be my sister. It could totally fall through and my heart could shatter again. But you know what? THIS is my passion. THIS is the call that God has given me- to care for and love these children in Guatemala. So I'm going to RUN after it. I am cautiously anticipating seeing what the Lord does! The thought of Claudia being adopted. What greater word could describe it? Hope.

This life is a long, hard journey. But it is not without hope. Even in the darkest hour we are not alone, and not without hope. Our God is a faithful God and He has shown me that so many times despite the challenging season of life. We have been given grace, mercy, compassion, and a future. Hope in abundance.

Holy Fire burn away,

my desire for anything

that is not of you and is of me.

I want more of you and less of me.

Empty me,

Empty me,

Fill, won't you fill me,

with you, with you.

Good Friday

It is Good Friday and there is so much to ponder. On this day, Jesus Christ made the greatest act of love that this world has ever known or will know. Never has there been a greater sacrifice. The Son of God hung on a cross- brutally scorned, mocked, spat on. When I think of the pain our Savior endured my pride is blown to the ground. It was my sin that He took upon His shoulders. But I am ever so thankful that He chose to love. He chose to die so that we may live. We will LIVE forever. Not because of ANYTHING we have done- ONLY because He died and paid the punishment for our sins. We will live eternally in heaven with God if we repent and except God's gift of eternal life, given by grace alone.

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast." Ephesians 2:8-9

“You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”- Romans 5:6-8

So today, I am mindful of and thankful for Jesus' amazing gift. As though I haven't given you enough to chew on....... here's a poem and 2 songs that have been running through my head.

The Greatest Gift of Love

As I think of this day, and my comfortable life
I can't help but imagine all the terrible strife
That sweet Jesus endured, and all for our gain.
For our gift of life, the Son of God was slain.

On that dark somber day our Christ Jesus was hung
On a cross made of wood, a victory won.
Each bitter thought was placed on his head
The price was paid- “It is finished,” he said.

I cannot comprehend this incredible act.
Such love we were shown, and we can't pay it back.
Undeserving, unappreciative, and selfish am I.
My heart breaks to think- for my sins did the Savior die.

On this day of rememberance, as we ponder it all.
May our hearts feel the grief, the results of the Fall.
May we see the great love that sweet Jesus has shown.

May the gift of salvation in this world be made known.

Molly 4/10/09

You all probably know this son but take a moment and ponder these wordsds:

How Deep the Father's Love For Us

How deep the Father's love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He should give His only Son

And make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss

The Father turns His face away

As wounds which mar the Chosen One

Bring many sons to glory

Behold the man upon his cross

My sin upon His shoulders

Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice

Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that held Him there

Until it was accomplished

His dying breath has brought me life

I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything

No gifts, no power, no wisdom

But I will boast in Jesus Christ

His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward

I cannot give an answer

But this I know with all my heart

His wounds have paid my ransom

Why should I gain from His reward

I cannot give an answer

But this I know with all my heart

His wounds have paid my ransom

Are you moved? Touched? Do you know this Son of God who died?? Will you join me in Heaven someday?? My prayer for this blog is always that God would use it to turn hearts to Christ. On this Good Friday as we consider this incredible free gift, would you consider taking apart in it? If you have not accepted God's free gift of grace and salvation, please do not hesitate!!

Praying you have a memorable Easter weekend. We are heading to our Good Friday service and I'm looking forward to communing, fellowshiping, and worshiping together with the Body tonight.

Love you all,

Molly

Prayer

Prayer has been a common theme recently in my life. God is definitely emphasizing it in His lessons with me! Our pastor has been doing a fantastic sermon series on Daniel. This week he talked about Daniel 9. It was really good and I was just really convicted of my prayer life (or lack of one)!

So... I thought I'd highlight some of his points for my benefit as well as anyone else who would be interested.

1. God Ordains Prayer
The greatest of Christians, the ones whose lives bore great fruit also spent much time in prayer. George Mueller (a huge advocate for the orphans) said, "I know my God, and my God knows me." Through prayer, He grew to know God on a deep level, and the Lord blessed that! God ordains prayer, it is a gift to us, that we can come to Him and just talk.

Pastor Bob also made a really good statement that I liked, "A beautiful, honorable man or woman is not formed in 1/2 hour. It takes a lifetime of prayer and seeking God."

2. God Motivates Prayer
The motive for our prayer is for God to be glorified. If we make God the object in our prayer, then our motive is for Him to be glorified. I am continually asking myself if I am seeking God in prayer or just seeking my own desires. There is definitely a difference and I fall into the pothole of selfishly praying far too often.

3. God Answers Prayer
God answers EVERY prayer. Does He answer them the way we want to? Absolutely not. Does He answer them that He might be glorified? YES. And the most beautiful thing is that we have done NOTHING for our God to answer prayers. We have done nothing that our God would turn His ear to our pleas. But He does. Because of His great mercy. This mercy that He gives freely, that's new every morning!
"We do not make requests of you because we are righteous, but because of your great mercy."
David 9:18.

In the past month God has been teaching me to pray with faith and expectancy. It is hard sometimes, but the least we can do is pray believing that God can and will answer in a way that will bring Him glory. As I've prayed for our friends the Semlows' adoption I've prayed for MIRACLES. As I've prayed for my trip to Guatemala I have been trying hard to pray for BIG things- things that only GOD in His mighty power to do. And trust that our God can and will answer in BIG ways. As soon as I started praying in that way the enemy whispered doubts and lies in my ear and I've had to learn to fight this- with more prayer!! God has shown Himself to us time and again so why do I have such unbelief and doubt?!

So as I continue on in my day I trust that my feeble prayers coming from my unrighteous heart are reaching the ears of the Almighty. And that He has heard and will answer in His time in His own way- to be glorified.