Rejoice

I have felt amazing all day. I don't know why. Sometimes I think the Lord gives me a break from my hypoglycemia stuff, where I can just think on where He's brought me, what He's teaching me, what joy is in the midst of pain or trial. I know that tomorrow my body will probably go back to the usual, but I'm rejoicing in this day, in the redeeming work He is doing in my heart and my life, in the strength and grace that He gives me every day.

This is a new favorite song of mine...love to ponder the words for hope on a bad day or thanksgiving on a day like today!

"Rejoice, rejoice, my weary soul, my hope is in the Lord alone.

He will never leave you or forsake you, so rejoice.

Rejoice, in the Lord, your mourning into dancing, rejoice.

Rejoice, in the Lord, your mourning into dancing, rejoice."

"You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
you have loosed my sackcloth
and clothed me with gladness,
¹²that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent.
O LORD my God, I will give thanks to you forever!"

Psalm 30:10-11

20 Things

We had to make a "bucket list" of 20 things we want to do before we die for our health class. I sat down at my computer thinking, "Oh this is going to be so easy. That's not many things at all." But as I got going, I realized that it's a harder task than I thought.

The Lord has given us one life. ONE. Our time on this Earth is precious. I want to make every minute count, yet I waste so much time. So much opportunity. The harvest is ripe, it is ready....and yet much of it is in the field rotting. At the same time, there is much that is being done for the kingdom, and it is beautiful. The Lord is growing hearts, churches are reaching out to the lost, missionaries are sharing the Gospel, families are adopting the orphan. Beautiful things are happening everyday.

So this list is not in any particular order, and some are obviously more important than others. I'm excited to see what God has for me...and which ones I'll get to cross off! :)

Health 195

3/31/11

20 Things to Do Before I Die

1. Get Married
2. Have a baby
3. Adopt kids
4. Run an orphanage
5. Go to Uganda
6. Evangelize and bring someone to Christ in Spanish
7. Run a half-marathon
8. Be a missionary over-seas (hopefully/maybe in Guatemala)
9. Read through the Bible in Spanish
10. Write a book or 2…
11. Speak at a women’s conference
12. Teach about orphans and adoption
13. Learn to cook
14. Go on a hiking adventure of some sort
15. Start a non-profit organization for adoptive families
16. Get my counseling license
17. Learn how to take quality pictures
18. Own and decorate my own house
19. Learn to lead worship on piano
20. Teach a health/parenting/lamaze class in Spanish

Represent!

I am all about representing adoption. There's all those moms who say they wear yoga pants and adoption shirts everyday but date night and church. Let me tell you a little secret....I'd LOVE to be that mom someday :)

Anyways, let's just say I'm building up my wardrobe early :)

147 Million Orphans is launching their new spring gear!! Just in time for Easter baskets....

Click above to check it out! These are awesome families who LOVE the orphan and we can help. All of their profits go to food, water, and medicine for orphans and children in poverty.

A glance...

Men, this is finally your chance to understand women a little bit better. I've had some very humorous conversations about how frustrated guys get with girls. And you're right, we really don't understand ourselves. But maybe this will give you a glimpse into part of it.

Ladies, I really wrote this poem is for you. I started writing this from the perspective of all of us. I've had many talks with friends the past few weeks about beauty, weight, and culture in regards to us as women. We all have different struggles but it all boils down to the same point- Some days, we just don't feel beautiful and we struggle to keep in focus the beauty that the Lord sees in us. But as I wrote, I felt prideful, knowing that I'd much rather use "us" and "we" to describe emotions than "I" and "me." I don't like owning up to the fact that I struggle with the battle of outer beauty vs inner beauty. I don't like admitting that I have trouble seeing the truth, that I let a number on the scale or a disappointing glance in the mirror define my confidence, my attitude, my thought life. So I wrote the rest of it from my perspective. My heart is laid open, and I hope that you can see that you are not alone and you are not without hope. Never without hope and never without our Father gazing down with a beaming smile on His face, declaring us His gorgeous, beautiful, perfect daughters.

A Glance

In every woman's heart you'll find a similar tale,

A glance in the mirror or a step on a scale

Can scream lies of unworthiness, or stories of hope

To which voice do we listen, how should we know?

Though we try to forsake the ways of this world,

To focus on Christ and His glory behold

We still long to be beautiful, long to be known

Yet the depriving and striving leaves us feeling alone

When will I embrace my beauty in Christ?

When will I believe the Love of my life?

When He says, "I delight in you," "I will never leave"

When He says, "My Beloved," will I truly believe?

One more look in the mirror, a decision to be made

I can choose to be happy or be discouraged, dismayed

For the girl that I see could be more skinny or pretty

But to Christ- I am perfect, displaying His glory

Created in His image, he is singing over me

I can be content, secure, happy, free!

God created every woman, to be a helper, mother, friend

He calls us beautiful, from now until the end.

3/29/11

I took some time today and prayed that the Lord would confirm in me a desire for His affirmation, a knowledge of His love for me, the beauty that He sees in me. I prayed that He would rip me of my efforts to improve myself, the efforts I put into making myself more beautiful on the outside are really a waste of time compared to the change He could bring to my inside, my heart. So take a moment and rest before the Love of our lives, the Lover of our souls. Take down the wall that's build up inside, take down the rules you make for yourself, take down the expectations you have for the mirror, the scale, the treadmill. The Lord wants us to live freely. I have never been so burdened for women to live in the freedom He gives, for myself to live in freedom. Enough rambling.

"Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

John 8:32

We are LOVED, we are CALLED, we are ADOPTED, we are DAUGHTERS, we are BEAUTIFUL.

This is TRUTH.

Home

My parents came to visit me this weekend. It was such a sweet time of fellowship as they met all of the friends I have made here.

Our campus ministry had a coffeehouse/talent show for all the parents on Saturday night and as I sat between my dad and Spencer I felt a sense of peace, a sense of security, a sense of home. My heart is here with this community, my parents and my boyfriend were sitting by me with dear friends close by. As I took a moment to praise God for these blessings, I realized just how scary it is to find a safe place, to be in a place of security. Its scary to think that in a moment, all of those things I cling to could fall away. But this is where the firm foundation of Christ comes in. If I build my life, my heart, and my faith on Him alone, then when the precious things of this Earth fail or disappoint me, I will still have Jesus on which to stand, praising Him for the gifts which give me security, joy, and peace in this earthly home.

"He laid the Earth on its foundations, it can never be moved."

Psalm 104:5

Cuteness

I don't think they get much cuter than this. I want to reach through the computer screen and kiss those darling pudgy cheeks. Or flying there would be a great option too :)

Handiwork

"For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10

There are lies whispered everywhere. From culture, media, peers, professors, the Enemy. What are we going to do to combat them? This is not just a part of life, it is a battle. A daily battle of finding who we are in Christ. We have to choose every day whether or not we will allow the Enemy to feed those lies. Or if we will believe TRUTH.

Not believing the truth has huge implications. It puts you in bondage. John 8:36 says, "So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." We are to live in freedom. The truth gives us freedom. The truth gives us an identity-we are God's handiwork. I LOVE this! He fashioned us. I picture an artist with her brush, thoughtfully adding minute details to the canvas. Or a potter forming the clay, carefully molding and shaping to perfection. The artist will not stop until the creation is just as he had envisioned. This is God with us! He made us in just the way that we ought to be. We do not need people to tell us if we are good enough. We are His handwork.

The truth gives us purpose- created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. We were created to do His work, which He already has planned for us. And because we were created by Him, we are already equipped with everything we need to carry out His calling. So despite what our GPA is, a "career aptitude test," the comments of a professor, or the skepticism and doubt from the Enemy gripping your heart, we ARE prepared, called, and created to do HIS work. No matter how hard, how discouraging, how crazy it may look.

I have been fighting a battle the past month unlike anything I have ever experienced. It is so full of passion, burden, and calling from the Lord. Yet at the same time, lies and doubts flood my heart. I never thought so much spiritual growth, testing, and challenge could come from one Spanish class.

Every day, I question myself why am I doing this when I don't have it takes. I ask myself what was I thinking when I signed up for this, when I decided to make Spanish my life for now. I feel like a failure, like I've wasted all these hours of studying and class time only to face the fact that I just wasn't cut out for this after all. These are the lies. And while they so easily captivate my attention, my gaze is so gently turned to the beauty of truth that happens when I tell people about my hopes for the future with Hispanic people. When my heart absolutely swells with love for the girl I hardly know, yet shares her heart and life with me for 2 hours of the week while I stumble through algebra lessons in Spanish with her.

I had a very humbling experience in class today that was humiliating and really just incredibly discouraging. I left the front of the room from my presentation feeling the silent message of "FAILURE" radiate from the professor. I sat back down at my desk and couldn't believe that I was about to start crying in a college classroom. You only do that in high school, right? But as I held back the tears I immediately started to pray that God would show me truth. To not let this experience bring me to failure but only a reminder of the identity that I have in HIM. I asked myself why I was crying. Was it because I was embarrassed by the critiques I had received? While my pride and confidence was definitely bruised, it was more a disappointment in myself and a stifling fear that I would not be able to accomplish this mission that I have. To me, this class is not 3 credits to add to the diploma. This class is one step towards what I feel God is calling me to. And the thought of giving up now brought a wave of sorrow that gripped my heart. So I chose to fight this battle. I pulled myself together, left class, went to my room, (cried a little more, but that's what girls do), and started searching Scripture, searching for any tokens of TRUTH to add to my weaponry as I choose victory.

I CHOOSE to believe that I am God's handiwork. He has created me to finish this class, to go to Spain, to be a Godly leader here on campus, to encourage and love others well, to handle my health issues with grace and gratitude. These tasks are not easy but He has created me with everything I need to accomplish the life He has for me.

I CHOOSE to believe that I was created to do good works, which He has prepared for me already! For some reason, He's brought me to this place, this school, to learn Spanish. Past that I'm not really sure, but it's so obvious that this is the work He has prepared for me in this time and place.

So I clothe myself in prayer, in Scripture, in the strength of the Lord, who goes before us in battle.

Will you take up your sword with me? Can we join together, praying for one another that Christ may be glorified through our lives?

My heart so desires this, brothers and sisters. We are His handiwork, let's win this battle together.

Love,

Molly