Friday, September 19, 2008

Thinkin' (again... it's one of the many things I do each day!)

Thinking about Claudia today and wishing I could hop on a plane and take her into my arms again. My heart was just aching for her and for her adoptive family. I nearly cried. What would it be like to be thousands of miles away from this daughter you've never even met for 3 WHOLE YEARS?? You've lovingly gazed at her picture a million times but can't seem to get any closer. The ache in your heart would grow so big. I've had the incredible blessing of hearing her contagious laugh and vibrant smile. I've gotten to hug her small body and kiss her cheeks. But the parents who have invested their whole hearts into this little girl and the journey of bring her home to her family haven't gotten this privelege. I was so sad for them today.

And i was also thinking about this sweet girl and the INCREDIBLE impact she's had on my life. Some of it's hard to explain because you have to know my heart and all of my dreams that I held onto before I went to Guatemala. Those two visits to Guatemala were monumentous in my walk with Christ. I captured His vision for the orphans while I was there, and I joined in the burden of taking care of these precious children. I'll never forget arriving at the orphanage. I stepped out our rental car and could immediately hear babies crying. It was agony not to run inside and pick them up, wipe their tears away, and show them all the love I had stored inside my heart all of those years. I usually tried to settle one down and move onto the next, giving as many babies attention as I possibly could each day. But sometimes, I would just sit and rock one for a long while. For some of them, that was the only time they would totally relax. Then, they would lay their head on your shoulder and sleep. Such precious moments. Oh my... I better stop or I will keep writing and start crying.

Here's some of my fave pics. and a video:

Me and my sweet girl

My "papa" and Claudia. She called him "el doctor"

This cutie was probably one of my favorite babies. She LOVED LOVED LOVED being held and you couldn't put her down. So I would usually end up picking up another one because I couldn't monopolize her but couldn't stand to hear her cry. She was the last baby that I held when I left in August. As the tears spilled down her cheeks when I put her back in her crib I cried right along with her...

Claudia, Jesus has His hand on you. You're blessed to be in a safe orphanage with loving "mommas" to take care of you. I would adopt you in a second if I could. God gave you and I a special bond and my heart soared when you recognized me after 5 months when I came back to Guatemala last August. You asked about "el doctor papa" and if he was going to come see you too. I miss you, sweet girl. I hope that someday i can come to see you walk in with your forever family from the airplane.... but that may not be God's plan. Whatever it is, may He bless you and keep you. You'll always have a special place in my heart.


Ella Marie Boutique said...

I know it must be hard for Claudia's fmaily to wait for such a long time. We are adopting a baby girl from Guatemala and she will be 10 months old next week and it seems like we have been waiting for her forever!

Annie said...

So're gonna make me cry too!